Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Precious Life

Baby Alexis in the arms of her cousin, Savannah-Jane
- photo courtesy of Krista

my great-neice Alexis' foot
- photo courtesy of Krista

precious one,
so small,
so sweet
dancing in on angel feet
straight from Heaven's brightest star
what a miracle you are!

"I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my spokesman to the world.” “O Sovereign Lord,’ I said, “I can’t speak for you! I’m too young!” “Don’t say that,” the Lord replied, “for you must go wherever I send you and say whatever I tell you. And don’t be afraid of the people, for I will be with you and take care of you. I, the Lord, have spoken!” Then the Lord touched my mouth and said, “See, I have put my words in your mouth! Today I appoint you to stand up against nations and kingdoms. You are to uproot some and tear them down, to destroy and overthrow them. You are to build others up and plant them.” Jeremiah 1:5-10

I remember when we first got married my husband and I talked about and planned when we would have children. I remember consulting all the well-known child development authorities' opinions about the best age gap between children. Some of the advice was, If they were close in age they would enjoy each other more and have more in common; If children are separated by more than three years or more, they can grow up not feeling like siblings. Then there was the advice not to have them close together because of sibling rivalry. A study published in the New England Journal of Medicine suggests that parents should wait 18 to 23 months after a full-term birth before conceiving again.
Seeking advice in planning a family is not a bad thing, but we do need to realize that God decides when a life should be created. He is God and we are not. His plans are bigger and much better than ours.

After being married exactly a year and one month, my husband and I announced to friends and family that our first little one was on the way. Taylor was born October 2, 1987. When Taylor was fourteen months old I got pregnant again.. Griff was born a month before his due date on September 2, 1989. Handling two vivacious toddlers was an exhausting job, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. I felt like I was doing what I was called to do. Such fulfillment. Then on Father's Day of 1991, I announced to my husband that we were expecting our third child. A complete surprise, unplanned by us, but we were definitely excited…yet a little concerned about having three children so close together. Taylor would barely be four years old and Griff would be only two years old when they new baby arrived. Savannah-Jane arrived February 17, 1992 and completed our family. We had three healthy, beautiful children. I was so thankful for the blessing. A wonderful husband and three precious children.

However, I wouldn't be honest if I told you it was all wonderful. I suffered from serious post-partum after the birth of Savannah-Jane and had to be hospitalized. My hormones raged. A dark depression set in. The task of motherhood completely overwhelmed me. I had to ask for help. Something I wasn't comfortable doing.
As time went on, it got easier. I learned to prioritize and let things go. God began teaching me a lot about myself… how I needed to yield to Him…give Him the reigns… let Him be in control. He is still teaching me. Life is good. My children have turned out to be great kids in spite of me!

Psalm 139:13-17 says For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them!

Couples may have "accidents", or "make mistakes", but God does not. If we believe in the sovereignty of God, we must conclude that there are no unplanned pregnancies. When a woman is pregnant, God Himself is forming a child within her. By this work God reveals His glory. -anonymous

I am learning to be grateful for life. Even the unplanned, unscheduled life happenings. God is good all the time. All the time God is good.

Isaiah 55:8 says For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways, declares the LORD.

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